Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Updates
More on Mary Carey [Backstage, 10-24-2006]: Her mother jumped off the building because she’s schizophrenic, and she was critically injured, but the dutiful daughter said she’s prepared to move to the F State permanently to care for her (if she survives) and would then start looking at Florida politics.
A long-ago News of the Weird favorite, Professor Jukka Ammondt [NOTW 406, 11-17-1995], is in the news again as his beloved Finland ascends to the presidency of the European Union (and stories circulate about the country’s crazies). Ammondt professionally sings Elvis Presley songs, er, rewritten Elvis Presley songs, um, rewritten into Latin. Finland actually has a Latin-language TV newscast.

Below The Fold
On the heels of that padded "bra-lette" for voluptuous 6-yr-olds [Backstage, 9-11-2006] comes Britain’s Tesco, selling a toy pole-dancing kit (with instructive DVD) for ages 4-6 . . . . . With its arsenal of "smart bombs" tied up in Iraq and Afghanistan, if the U.S. had to open another war front, said the chairman of the Joint Chiefs, we "would end up using more dumb bombs" . . . . . The fastest-growing cosmetic surgery choice: eyelash transplants, for the seriously, seriously insecure . . . . . Alert Kobayashi and the Black Widow: Volodymr Stryhaniv won the pork-fat-eating contest in Lutsk, Ukraine (and he is, as they are, slim) . . . . . Montana high school principal Eric Messerli is back at work after serving a 6-day suspension for giving a student a wedgie (playfully, trying to be one of the guys [which is his problem, said the school board]).