Saturday, October 21, 2006

Turkmenistan’s super-egomaniac President (-for-life) Niyazov [NOTW 923, 10-16-2005] has just debuted his poetry in plays in five new theaters, but for the first time, he’s a reluctant super-egomaniac: "Please do not hail me quite so often. It is hard for me to listen to applause meant only for me."
The what-me-worry George Russell Weller, 89, famous for turning the humble 1992 Buick LeSabre into DeathCar 2003 at the Santa Monica, Calif., farmers' market [NOTW 882, 1-2-2005], was convicted on all counts and awaits sentencing (unless he goes off to the Great Farmers' Market first).
And here comes, possibly, the first person in Washington state to be charged under its brand-new bestiality law (passed after that notorious 2005 Enumclaw, Wash., case [NOTW 916, 9-28-2005] in which a horse literally ripped a guy a new one). This fella, in Spanaway, Wash., was caught by his wife, hooked up with the family’s 4-year-old pit bull terrier, and she has the photos. (Now, an even grosser story came out this week from Superior, Wis.: Bryan James Hathaway, 20, who had just been released from the joint for an animal-cruelty conviction, was caught having sex with a deer carcass. He said, y’know, he saw the deer in the ditch and got aroused. That happens.)

Below The Fold
A Riverside, Calif., judge lets a female flasher go free because the criminal statute reads only "exposes his person" [emphasis supplied] . . . . . Ronald Dotson of Ferndale, Mich., is a serial mannequin stalker/stealer who has somehow escaped Yr Editor’s attention over the years, but he’s back behind bars after being unable to lay off that "woman" in the French maid’s uniform . . . . . A Suffolk, Va., woman had homicide charges dropped because state abortion law apparently gives her the right to (as she did) shoot herself in the belly to avoid motherhood . . . . . Official Boy Scout policy among Los Angeles-area troops is, Don’t illegally download music or video, and Scouts who learn that get actual merit patches . . . . . The man who baptized the late serial killer/cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer is pretty sure Dahmer is wearing wings right now, basking in the House of the Lord.