Do Chinese live better dead than they lived alive? / Yep, people do mistakenly reformat the hard drive / There are underground people in Bozeman, Montana / And once again with that "anti-rape" condom
Civilization in Decline
At China’s annual Tombsweeping Festival, where relatives burn fake money at cemeteries so that the dead will have prosperous afterlives, they’ve started to burn paper depictions of, er, Viagra . . . . . A county zoning board in Ireland turned down a property owner’s request to build three large windows in his house because it’s adjacent to a livestock field, and the windows might, to pent-up cows, resemble escape routes. (Seriously)
The Human Condition Today
Three former subordinates (females) sued NYC welfare office supervisor Serena "Hurricane" Reaves-Cain for alleged workplace fondling, kissing, and spanking . . . . . More kudos for our nation of critical thinkers: The "natural mineral water" of the Saratoga (N.Y.) Spa State Park has, for the past 20 yrs, been mixed with tap water, but, of course, there’s never been a complaint . . . . . A couple things wrong with British lawyer Alan Burkitt: He has had a girlfriend for about 8 yrs who has an IQ of 52, and now he’s been sentenced (no jail time) for pimping her out to pay the mortgage (and, in a sense of fairness, pimping himself out, too, but "There was little interest in him," said his lawyer) . . . . . A computer technician re-formatting a disk drive at the Alaska Dept. of Revenue wiped out the applicant records for the state’s program for distributing oil revenue to residents (and then discovered the plan-b backup [tape] was corrupted and now must rely on plan-c, which is 300 boxes of paper records) . . . . . Bozeman, Mont., police report: "A woman living on Springhill Lake reported strange noises coming from underneath her house . . being made by people from the "underworld" . . to get her to leave. She then said that her house had at one time been replaced by another house in the middle of the night and her original house was being stored in an undisclosed location" (and so on).
Your Daily Losers
Three guys driving across the Triborough Bridge in NY with 110 packets of cocaine on ‘em and, er, No, I didn’t bring any money for the toll, Did you, No, Did you, Well, no . . ..
South African inventor Sonnet Ehlers’s anti-rape condom [NOTW 908, 7-3-2005] (which, if you can get the rapist to put it on [CORRECTION: see below], quickly morphs on the inside into an unremovable sheath that, er, pricks the wearer painfully until he can find a surgeon to remove it) has finally survived the patent process and is ready to go. [Ed.: Having written about this 3 times in the past, it pains me that I momentarily forgot that this is a "female condom," meaning the woman wears it, and when the rapist strikes, he's done for.]
A cop in Mims, Fla., saved Gregory Renfroe’s life: He found Renfroe atop a power pole, standing on his recently-disconnected line (overdue bill), attempting to reconnect (and apparently minutes away from having himself lit up).
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.