Friday, April 13, 2007

Friday’s Drip
[NOTE: It's pretty certain Yr Editor will not post tomorrow. Actually, except for the news-news, it’s been a pretty light week, anyway. But if later-today's news flood demands, I'll be here.]

Civilization in Decline
Britain’s Home Dept. has a great idea, to take the 1,500 most dysfunctional families (whose crime, and incompetence at co-existing with others, cost the gov’t a (seemingly wildly made-up) equivalent of $1.04 billion a year, house them in special quarters, monitor them, and teach them coping skills . . . . . District of Calamity: The Washington, D.C., gov’t is so out of control [Ed.: District of Columbia gov't, out of control? Why didn't someone say something sooner?] that it has sucked up to the transit workers’ union enough that it's almost forced to pay massive overtime instead of hiring new workers.

The Human Condition Today
A state in northeastern Malaysia has agreed with religious officials to set up a rehab camp for cross-dressers . . . . . According to the surveillance video, the jail guard in Mankato, Minn., just walked into the guy’s cell, picked up a Bible, and started slapping him with it . . . . . A West Va. school bus driver parked the bus outside an adult book store, with the driver’s 10- to 12-yr-old daughter still on it, and went inside to shop (Bonus: The bus driver’s a woman [but, of course, just picking up something for a "friend"]) . . . . . A British diplomat in Thailand started blogging for The Nation newspaper, and soon the comments section had notes from people outing him as a regular in Bangkok’s red-light district.

Your Daily Loser
David McGregor, 35, whiskey-fortified, was jailed in Perth, Scotland, for 16 months, following a break-in, which we all celebrate now as McGregor’s 100th criminal conviction (and, at his age, this is like Alex Rodriguez’s having 470 home runs at age 32).

NOTW Lite
British researchers find that playing in the dirt can be just as depression-relieving as Prozac-type medications (Seriously) . . . . . Is there an FAA understaffing problem, just because two airliners had to circle Manchester, N.H., because the lone air traffic controller was taking a potty break? . . . . . Ellen Massey, 58, is now resting comfortably at a hospital after the Monday incident in NYC, at the Mets’ game, when she was blindsided in her seat by a 300-lb. fan tumbling down on her from a higher-up row (but who apparently, nimbly scurried away before any insurance information could be exchanged)..

NOTW, The Blog
Erroror: As a few readers have pointed out (two with those letter groups after their names, which I knew I was in big trouble when I saw), I wrote confusingly yesterday about the turd transplant. The reality is: Bacteria in the digestive tract . . Good. Anti-bacteria . . Bad. What was being transplanted into the patient was a houseful of good bacteria strong enough to destroy the dangerous bacteria associated with caca. I have corrected the original.
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.