Monday, May 14, 2007

Monday’s 5-Star Special
In a story that sort of reeks of "April 1" (though it’s from "May 11") and in the style of the fabulists at (though it comes from the website of the quite-upright German newsweekly Der Spiegel), we get a discussion of objectophilia, which is not about fetishes but about genuine affection and commitment expressed for objects rather than for humans, e.g., the Berlin Wall, the Twin Towers, steam locomotives, an iBook. (Bonus: If the object of your affection has to go into the shop for repairs, you get pangs of infidelity.) Some professor or other says it’s part of society’s drift to asexuality.

REMINDER: NOTW Daily is posted Mon through Sat by noon, NY time—except this month, when it’s Mon-Wed-Fri only, and Friday by 4 p.m.

Civilization in Decline
The Arrangements Have Been Made: Y’say y’could use maybe $360K to put your life in order? Well, that’s how much Fidelity Investments earns yearly by the simple act of raising 25 cows on its valuable suburban-Dallas property (taxable value: $10.6M, except if there’s cattle on it: $25K) . . . . . Los Angeles Housing Dept. shelled out $18K for staff seminars from a Zen Buddhist, teaching such skills as centering yourself by holding yourself in . . . . . Gee, Congress would certainly like to do something about global warming, but apparently it’s powerless when the Nat’l Rural Electric Cooperative Ass’n starts lobbying for more loans for coal-fired power plants (enough new ones, over 10 yrs, said the Washington Post, "to offset all state and federal efforts to reduce U.S. greenhouse gas emissions during that time") . . . . . Democracy blooms in India’s Uttar Pradesh state, where 15% of this season’s candidates had been charged with crimes, and where some of them pulled off fresh victories (including the guy facing 59 charges including murder and kidnaping), and where some of them ran their campaigns from jail [Wall Street Journal, 5-12-2007, pay-per-view] . . . . . "Many of our children have no hair and bad teeth" is how a resident of the nearby Yellow River in China describes life, where 10% of the flow is raw sewage.

The Human Condition Today
The urge to play Barbie dolls with roadkill: Somebody dressed up a fawn real pretty-like in Tacoma, Wash., for some reason, and last week, an art student at Southern Illinois Univ. started dressing up possums and raccoons, to get drivers to pay more attention to the road . . . . . Republican presidential candidate Tommy Thompson said the reason he ignored (in a debate question) the fact of legal protection for gays and lesbians (in favor of a business’s using its own judgment about discrimination) was mainly because he had to go potty real bad . . . . . A company in Kitchener, Ontario, sells industrial strength adult diapers (holding up to 9 cups’ worth), advertised for casino-slot-playing obsessives (but probably also of jealous-astronaut-grade) . . . . . Speaking of which: Involved in a resisting-arrest incident in Anchorage, Alaska: a renewable-resource assault weapon . . . . . Inexplicable: Reuters leaves us hanging by ignoring a motive why a wealthy South Korean business mogul and his bodyguards would snatch some karaoke restaurant waiters and beat the crap out of them

Her body looked intact, but inside her skin, her head had become separated from her spine (which is a way-bad thing), and incredibly, doctors know how to fix something like that (though it doesn’t always work) (and, man, does it ever hurt).

Our man Tony Alleyne (the guy who meticulously remodeled his modest London flat into the flight deck of the Starship Enterprise [NOTW 947, 4-2-2006; NOTW 793, 4-20-2003]) finally sold it for (if the buyer comes through) about 5 times what it would have been without the remodel. (He had started work to recover from a nasty divorce and once pulled the apartment off the market for lack of takers but that was before he tried eBay!)
Two of last year’s headline bestiality cases were resolved last week: Ronald Kuch accepted a plea to hitting on a dead dog in Saginaw, Mich., and will be sentenced in July, and Michael McPhail, whom Yr Editor had just mentioned last week (sex with live dog in Washington state) was acquitted of all charges by a jury in Tacoma!

Professor Music’s Weird Links
Actually, a pretty spiffy, attention-getting idea from those alleged-human-cloning attention-getters, the Raelians: The West raises money for third-world poverty, malaria, AIDS, etc., so why not battle female genital mutilation the same way? ClitorAID!

NOTW, The Blog
Yr Editor has made several rather minor errors lately, and I fully intend to correct the original posts, but, man, am I busy this month. I’ll try to make the fixes today and tell you about them on Wednesday. Thank you to all.
Newsrangers: Mark Neunder, Ginger Katz, Jeff Grenier, Steve Miller.
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.