Saturday, September 29, 2007

Saturday’s 5-Star Special
At the Los Angeles County Fair, 30 obsessed entrants vied in this year’s competitive table-setting. "Tablescaping" requires a combination of artistry and obedience to the Emily Post-type rules of dinnerware placement, e.g., if you’re setting a James Bond-scenario table, the spoons can’t be further up than the plate, of course, and the tablecloth must be perfectly aligned on the table, but a properly-placed cigarette lighter and handgun add to the score. Judges say they are considering improvements for next year, such as asking whether a diner might actually enjoy eating food off of the setting.

Civilization in Decline
A Los Angeles mother wanted her stillborn baby back from the coroner after an autopsy but was informed that state law allows, if the "baby" is less than 20 weeks old or under 400g, to be tossed out as "bio-waste" . . . . . Carlton Turner Jr, 28, is one of the two Texas death-row inmates whose executions were held up by this week’s SCOTUS lethal-cocktail review, and Turner has been adamant about that all along because he’s worried that the 3-drug regimen will be painful (whereas, presumably, the deaths of his mom and dad had come quickly upon being shot by Carlton) . . . . . If you’re a U.S. media consultant, and you want to take the gloves off, apparently you go work for a parliamentary leader up for re-election in Ukraine, where incumbent prime minister Viktor Yanukovych’s consultants seem to have OK’d his calling his chief rival, Ms. Yuliya Tymoshenko, a "cow on an ice rink" . . . . . The next battleground over "abstinence" education: Can you reduce young people’s binge-drinking if you teach them to drink at home in moderation?

The Human Condition Today
Nationally-known (they say) cardiologist Maurice Buchbinder lost his Scripps Memorial hospital (San Diego, Calif.) privileges after he smacked around a combative patient, post-op, in August (Bonus: He even gave him a Stooges move, by grabbing his nose and twisting hard) . . . . . Über small-town-white-guy Ben Daly, 18, of Leakey, Tex. (head west from San Antonio, through Hondo, and hang the first right, that is, if you don’t want to go through Uvalde) is defiant that Leakey High School can’t make him cut his hair, because he’s a Rasta! . . . . . Her younger brothers found an 85-yr-old British woman who had been wrongly institutionalized for, er, 70 yrs, but it turns out now that the first 45 yrs were apparently OK with their mom (who died 25 yrs ago) . . . . . A 36-yr-old man died of blood-poisoning, two weeks after being bitten by his family’s pet rat, Roger . . . . . Scottish pro golfer Marc Warren was cut pretty badly in his Irish hotel room between rounds when he took a swing with a 5-iron, and his backswing shattered a glass chandelier.

Your Daily Loser
Free-lance Minneapolis tree-trimming know-it-all Will Samson, 36, is in jail on $50k bail; he happened by and volunteered some advice to two pro tree-trimmers and then went ballistic (knife, baseball bat) when they failed to take it.

Professor Music’s Weird Links
Not today. Maybe tomorrow.™

Pedro Zapeta needed 11 yrs to save up his $59k (not two), which actually makes his story (from yesterday’s NOTW Daily) sadder. Thanks to eagle-eyed readers. I quickly corrected the NOTW Daily web page, but the e-mail readers get only one shot at my copy, and if I make subsequent changes, they won’t know about them unless they visit the web page. I give e-mail readers only one shot because I’m guessing that I’d make more people unhappy, than happy, if I sent two or three versions of the same daily post to reflect changes or errors in the text. My promise remains: If you sign up for the e-mail, I’ll bother you only once a day.

Newsrangers: Ginger Katz
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.