Monday, October 15, 2007

Monday’s 5-Star Special
The Vatican ID’d Msgr. Tommaso Stenico (a high-ranking Church bureaucrat) on a TV's hidden camera telling a man that gay sex is not a sin, and even that he’s gay, himself, and so the Church suspended him, but he now says, well, of course it’s a sin, and besides he’s never had gay sex but was just pretending to be gay (and he’s obviously very good at that, according to the video).

Civilization in Decline
The NY Post audited the green-preaching Mayor Bloomberg’s carbon footprint and found it the same size as the footprint of 18 avg Americans, 53 Europeans, or 404 Guatemalans . . . . . Texas’s state police have refused, over 2 yrs now and $165k in private attorney fees, to give up a specific surveillance tape of the area just off the floor of the Legislature, allegedly because it would show a favored lobbyist breaking the law (or maybe worse?) (Bonus: the official excuse? homeland security!) . . . . . In Halifax, Nova Scotia, the union got its teachers excluded from duty monitoring the lunchroom (in 1970, they got that!), and now parents have to pay C$200 a yr for monitors unless their kids can go home, eat, and get back within the 50 minutes allotted for lunch . . . . . London’s The Sun interviews shop owners and town officials, who say gov’t safety rules, plus insurance company admonitions, mean there’ll be fewer Christmas decorations this yr (but they’re still OK, provided you put them up via a hydraulic lift rather than climbing a ladder) . . . . . UK Headline: "Patients Pull Own Teeth as [Nat’l Health Service] Dental Contract Falters."

The Human Condition Today
Mr. Gao, newly arrived in Shanghai (where he saw a train for the first time), played chicken on the tracks as one approached, just to test his nerves (and he got away with it) . . . . . Alarmed citizens called police when a guy walked by the courthouse in Oklahoma City wearing one handcuff on his wrist, but it was just part of his goth fashion for the day . . . . . South Korean Sim Jae-Duck did not win the Nobel Peace Prize, but give him time: He’s started a World Toilet Ass’n to raise consciousness about sanitation (the competition is the World Toilet Organization, in Singapore), and he’ll actually live in a huge toilet monument (Bonus: He was born in a latrine, part of some tradition or other) . . . . . Fine Point of Anti-Discrimination Law: So, your mother is 88 and needs assisted-living, including help with bodily stuff, and so insists on a female nurse, and who shows up but "Sue," a 6-ft, rough-edged, square-jawed person in one of her first jobs after the operation . . . . . Inglewood, New Zealand, priest Father Gary volunteered to make regular runs to the closest town last yr to buy women underwear after the one emporium in Inglewood stopped carrying them, but he proudly announces that the trips will stop now that there's bus service and people can go buy their own damned knickers.

Your Daily Loser
A woman was about to run from a bounty hunter in Oklahoma City, and facing Tasering, smartly stuck her infant in front of her as a shield (and it partially worked, as the tot caught one of the Taser needles, breaking the current)

People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
Police in a Washington, D.C., suburb in Virginia suspect it’s the same man, over 2 yrs, who’s too cool, apparently, to flash teenage girls his own package and so whips out a laptop with porn on it [second item] before running off.

Sounds Like a Joke: From German artist Marcus Kison, a ring for the finger, with a digital display that will note your running total of Google hits, in real time, on the market next yr . . . . . Terrye Cheathem is about to introduce her prison line of greeting cards (e.g., "Sorry to Hear About Your Arrest," "I know that I have not visited you. But I still care about you.").

Good Enough for Gov’t Work
An Asst U.S. Atty Gen’l said last week that at least 108 countries work through front companies to procure Pentagon equipment and parts, much of it because to buy upfront would have broken U.S. law (including F-14 parts to Iran!).

Sri Chinmoy passed away on Thursday, he of the alleged superhuman endurance feats [NOTW 564, 11-27-2000], which he employed to call attention to his world-peace calmatives; he was widely lauded (by Al Gore, Mikhail Gorbachev, Muhammad Ali), but he also was famously nasty to those who ultimately decided that he was full of crap.

Professor Music’s Weird Links
According to this website, a company that hired the soothingly-credible Gary Coleman as a hawker will lend you $2,600 if only you’ll promise to pay them back $216 a month for the next 3½ yrs ($9,095).

NOTW, The Blog
A reader advises that the House Foreign Affairs Committee’s Armenian genocide vote [NOTW Daily, 10-12-2007] was born of an attempt by Democrats to pressure Turkey to cut off access across its border for U.S. war supplies into Iraq. But things sorta got away from them and are now way, way out of control.

Newsrangers: Dave Null, Matthew McGill, Mark Neunder, Bob Pert, Edward Ingram, Emmitt Dove, Gary Goldberg, H.Thompson, Scott Langill, Nancy Hackett
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.