Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Tueday’s 5-Star Special
Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez’s bladder caught up with him, at the OPEC summit in Saudi Arabia. He’s said to be renowned for hours-long, live TV speeches in which he sips coffee but is never seen, er, excusing himself, but he finally broke away at a press conference: "Look, I have to go. [F]or a while now, I have needed to go to the bathroom, and I am going to pee . . . Do you want me to pee on you?"

Civilization in Decline
Something you probably didn’t know: Most employer health-insurance plans allow "subrogation" (like if you have an accident and get medical care on the policy, and you then sue somebody for the accident and win "medical expenses," the employer gets first dibs on that payout), but, relax, because apparently employers only insist on subrogation in the cases with the largest lawsuit payouts, i.e., the cases when an employee really needs the extra money, to pay for enduring life care [Wall Street Journal, subscription-only link, but which you can possibly click on for free by going to this Digg link (let me know if it works)] . . . . . The "Florida Classic" is like Super Bowl weekend for black Floridians, with the football game between Florida A&M and Bethune-Cookman only part of the show, and the event (in Orlando) usually brings out the, uh, best in local police, and this yr featured a nervous cop spraying mace, as if it were air freshener, over a "seemingly peaceful downtown crowd."

The Human Condition Today
The former Atlanta superchurch headed by "archbishop" Earl Paulk is further coming apart after revelations that Earl’s 34-yr-old nephew is really Earl’s 34-yr-old son . . . . . Also: One of Australia’s largest DNA testing facilities reported that 10 yrs ago, 1 in 10 daddies weren’t the daddies but that now it’s almost 1 in 4 . . . . . Austin (Tex.) Area Interreligious Ministries scheduled its multifaith gathering this yr at a Baptist church, which agreed to host it until it dawned on them that "interreligious" meant Muslims might be praying there, and thus, no can do, and so a church official asked the community to "understand and be tolerant" of the church’s position . . . . . A former Dallas Cowboys linebacker, who’s now a Redmond, Wash., pastor, threatened to bring Microsoft to its knees over its policy of tolerance of gays; gonna "put a firestorm" on ‘em.

Your Daily Loser
David Holland was arrested in San Jose, Calif., after he submitted a DNA sample to police to help clear his brother of rape and murder, and the DNA sample linked David himself to the unsolved rape of an 81-yr-old woman. Said the prosecutor, "We have to assume he didn’t expect this to happen."

Carpet Classic Floor Studio (Highland Township, Mich.) got accidentally rammed simultaneously by two drunk drivers . . . . . An indigenous language still spoken by only two people in Mexico is in danger because the two men don’t speak to each other anymore.

Good Enough for Gov’t Work
A Maine farm got a visit from the FDA because its egg nog was illegal: In order to protect people with egg allergies who might buy egg nog not knowing that it has egg in it, the farm will have to recall, and re-label, its egg nog to specifically list "egg" as an ingredient . . . . . Andrew Johnson (white, innocent) was arrested in Orlando instead of Anthony Johnson (black, wanted for drug possession), but, No Problem, Andrew, because the state attorney’s office in Fort Lauderdale has a special "it’s not me" unit, which usually gets to the bottom of things, er, within "three weeks."

Professor Music’s Weird Links
A collection of singers and singing groups badly in need of promotion and design advice. [PDF]

NOTW, The Blog
Erroror: As more news emerges about the New York physician who Yr Editor reported last week [NOTW Daily, 11-15-2007] as having used the same needle and syringe for yrs: Well, he used many needles and syringes, but apparently all, or many, were used over and over on multiple patients.

Newsrangers: Joe Littrell, Lurene Haines, Mark Neunder, Paul Music
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2007 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.