Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Dennis Kucinich never talks about his 1982 sighting of a UFO (disclosed by Shirley MacLaine in a new book), but the Wall Street Journal got the skinny from his two companions that night. (Most logical evidence: The craft, or thingie, or spirit, whatever, chose to hover near a vacation home owned by MacLaine, a notorious kindred spirit to other-dimensionals.) [A large portion of Americans believes that we are, as they say, not alone, but Kucinich, by his silence, appears to recognize that maybe the majority would prefer a leader who will be tough on all illegal aliens.]

Civilization in Decline
Here’s another case highlighting the British law in which criminals don’t have to pay their prison room and board, but non-criminals do (if they get gov’t compensation for the mistaken conviction) . . . . . The annual criticism is out on states that are still collecting hundreds of millions of bucks yearly from that massive tobacco company settlement but spending next to nothing on anti-smoking education (in Connecticut’s case, zero on anti-smoking) . . . . . The Washington Post’s latest salvo against the District of Calamity school system: The ($80 million worth of) boilers installed in the late 1990s have now largely broken down for lack of about $100k/yr on maintenance (e.g., classrooms in 71 schools had to be closed last February for lack of heat); in other words, if the school system had figured out how to do without just one of its many administrators, problem solved . . . . . NASA released a massive amount of data on its investigation of airline safety but intentionally put it in a form rendering alarming conclusions impossible to draw (and it’s in the genes of bureaucrats to be able to do that, or to do the opposite) (Yet, as the lead critic noted, when 8 out of 10 of the pilots who were asked for interviews, gladly gave them, it suggests they had some things to get off their chests).

The Human Condition Today
In the F State, there was a toy and children’s furniture yard sale at the home of two sex offenders (and don’t ask whose stuff it used to be) (and the Word of the Day: "Lysol") . . . . . Adam Grennan looked around the bank when he first came in, but he should have re-surveyed before he presented the holdup note because by that time, a cop in uniform was standing right behind him, with gun drawn --- embarrassing! . . . . . Readers’ Choice: The tattoo customer placed the .357 Magnum down so the tattooist could trace it for the tat design, and somehow both men wound up getting shot . . . . . The lovely former Miss Desert Sun 2006 was arrested for kidnaping and torturing her ex-boyfriend (Bonus: She’s now a law student and works for a federal judge) . . . . . Since competition is horrendous for those 65,000 visas a yr that the U.S. awards to high-performing foreign professionals, immigrants need an edge, and apparently, in Hyderabad, it’s offering prayers with the Visa God at the Chilkur Balaji temple, and maybe it works!

NOTW Lite
In Minnesota, pit bulls try to rehab their image—as assistance dogs . . . . . An Archives of Sexual Behavior article says men have huger endowments than apes because of our larger brains [Ed.: Evolutionists’ explanation: As babies’ brains grew, vaginas needed to grow to accommodate, and large penises therefore became favored. Creationists' explanation: Er . . ..].

Professor Music’s Weird Links
It’s a great time to be alive, with this Internet thing. In the old days, if you got off on seeing young women ambulating with leg casts, you just had to maybe camp out near hospitals. But now there's gimpix.com!

NOTW, The Blog
(1) Erroror: The 9-yr-old boy burglar (with a 5-yr-old wingman) on Monday was actually a 9-yr-old girl. (2) Last week, Yr Editor reported that a Whole Foods employee was in trouble with the company for tracking down a shoplifter (off the property, technically on his own time [NOTW Daily, 12-28-2007]), but here’s a 7-Eleven clerk, on duty, who not only violated company policy, he emptied his damn gun on the guy!

Newsrangers: Karl Olson, Sam Gaines, Paul Music, Emory Kimbrough
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2008 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.