Thursday, June 26, 2008

Thursday’s Creme de la Weird

Supreme Court upholds the right to confront a witness against you, even if you might have killed her
He was on trial for murdering his ex-girlfriend, and the prosecutor wanted to present a damning statement she had supposedly made against him, but no can do because she’s not available for the defendant to cross-examine. USA Today

The Romanian senate passed a law requiring that half the reported news be happy, positive news
But let’s look on the bright side: It’s the only country in the world where, by force of law, half the news has to be negative. Agence France-Presse

Saudi “marriage official” rules that even 1-yr old girls can get nuptialated up
That’s just as long as there’s no sex, because 1-yr-olds aren’t ready for that. Age 9, now, that’s different. Fox News // Memri

Ozark doctor gets off the hook after punching his daughter in the head
He’s of African heritage, he told the judge, and the “konk” is a type of punishment common in his home country, and besides, it’s just a a little knuckle tap “to get the attention of a child.” Springfield (Mo.) News-Leader

“Did you see me take my thing out and urinate?”
That was Michael Hoppe, 56, acting as his own lawyer and cross-examining the cop who had ticketed him for relieving himself in public. “Did you test DNA [in the pee puddle] to see if it was my urine?” Verdict: Not guilty Portsmouth (N.H.) Herald

The Human Condition Today
His best friend was hospitalized with a gunshot wound, and Zachary Enloe, 20, explained that, well, they had been practicing their quick draws with empty guns, and he had simply forgotten that he had subsequently loaded his (a few minutes earlier) . . . . . People Different From Us: Yes, judge, I went to see my boyfriend in jail despite the stayaway order against him, but look, judge, we both assault each other all the time, she said (That night, in fact, “I picked him up three or four times and slammed him on the ground.”) . . . . . Yr Editor fears senior-moment gas-brake confusions, but on the other hand, Yr Editor never met Roberta McCain, the potential First Mother, who at age 96 still collects her share of speeding tickets . . . . . The Italian architect getting reams of publicity this week for his planned, super-challenging, 80-story revolving tower in Dubai says, Trust me, We can build this (even though he claims an honorary doctorate from Columbia University, which has officially never heard of him) . . . . . A teenager got a judicial restraining order against, er, the mayor of Greeley, Colo.

Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict based on mugshot only]
These are suspects in a pretty gross murder in Richardson, Tex., so evaluate them very carefully in that they could get the needle. WFAA-TV (Dallas-Fort Worth)

NOTW Lite
The only clever criminals are smugglers: Brazilian inmates run drugs and cell phones via carrier pigeons (but with heavy loads, some birds were struggling to get airborne) . . . . . United Fire Casualty’s headquarters (Cedar Rapids, Iowa) is under three feet of water, and, guess what, they’ve got a little bit of flood insurance coverage, but not much . . . . . Quite a scene at the Eagle Trace Golf Course in Broomfield, Colo., what with scheduling that junior tournament (ages 7-12) to end about the start time of the charity tournament populated with dancers from a local strip club (“Mom, why is she only wearing underwear?”) . . . . . If you’re one of the 10,000 holders of North Carolina license plates containing the letter group “WTF,” you can swap it out because the state admits it was clueless in issuing them.

Professor Music’s Weird Links
Admit it: You’re not surprised, are you, to find out that some artist paints using his nutsack as a brush (Safe for Work).

Newsrangers: Mark Neunder, Sam Gaines, Derek Costello, Rick Matz
This posting to News of the Weird Daily is © 2008 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.